Seven years ago on August 12, 2002...

Do you remember where you were and what you were doing 7 years ago today? I do. I was pacing my house waiting to hear from Travis Lyn, for him to let me know he was ok and would be home soon. I called friends and family to pray everything would be ok. But deep in my heart I knew, I knew he was not coming home...at least not to me. Instead he went to his home in heaven. The empty hole left in my heart was indescribable. I prayed for it not to be true. But deep in my heart I knew, I knew he was not coming home. I faded away from all I knew. I went into a deep dark world, a hell of sorts. But now that time has passed, what has happened? Well I walked out of that hell. I found the strength through God to face each and every day, to face the horror of living that day without Travis Lyn. Two years later on August 12, 2004, 2 of the most wonderful boys moved in with me. They begged me not to send them back to their hell. So together we started on our road to healing. I cannot tell you what the boys have done for me...that would be like telling you what God has done for me...I could never get it all said. On August 15, 2007, we made our family "official" and they boys legally became mine. While I can never reveal what the courts have sealed I will tell you Travis and Nathan and I left the courtroom 3 very different people. Today we look back over our lives, where we were and what we were doing...struggling to survive. We thank God for what he has done for us. For through our own hell we found the courage to change a life. We never take life for granted...we know in an instant it can be changed forever. Seven years ago I was 8 months from being an RN...a dream I have had since a little girl...today I will start the journey over and will again begin the road to being an RN. Seven years ago Travis and Nathan were struggling to survive a home where they were not wanted among many other hellish ordeals. Today we are a happy family...loved, happy, and survivors. Do you remember where you were and what you were doing 7 years ago today?

Just Life

There are a lot of people I want to thank for all the hard work they have done in helping take care of me while I have been on best rest and preparing for surgery. Mom, what can I say...thank you for being there no matter what. It gets rough sometimes but you always find a way to help. Dad, wow, it really is hard doing my "job" on a daily bases...thank you for trying to keep it up. To my wonderful boys, Travis and Nathan, I am so proud of y'all for pitching in and helping to the best of your abilities! Bro. & Sis. Holley, y'all are awesome! Thank you for all your prayers. I know things don't always go like we plan them to or like we want them to but thank you for reminding me that God is in control and already has things worked out. A HUGE thank you to Linda for all she has done to help me out...it has been a HUGE blessing! Tammy, thank you for driving 2 hours to come and help me out. You and I both know there is way too much here for me to tackle by myself when I am well much less when I am sick. Alicia, thak you for coming and lending a hand. These people have gone out of their way to make sure things are getting done so mom, dad, the boys, and I don't have so much to do after the surgery.

For my friend and his family

Hello friends, I am asking you to keep my friend Kenny and his family in your prayers. If you keep up with the news at all you might remember the horrible house fire in Electra this week. My friend's sister died in that fire. For those of you who know me really well you will also remember Kenny from Travis Lyn's funeral, he is the one who gave a speech on behalf of AMR (that never took his shades off). I know the family would really appreciate yor prayers. Thank you in advance.

If you only knew

If you only knew where I have been, where I am now, and the struggles I have faced then you would know how good God is. Yesterday was an incredible day at church both morning and evening. As the morning service started I was just kind of there. Not uncommon, all Christians have been in that mode at some point. It took ALL I had to push through what I was feeling. Finally there was enough break through I was able to comfortably worship. Yes there was a lot on my mind and it was hard to be totally focused on church...I admit it, my mind wondered A LOT. However, I decided the evening service WAS NOT going to be the same. I work on a rotating schedule so I really have to get all I can out of the services I am able to attend. It was incredible! I had a MADE UP MIND that NO MATTER WHAT I was GOING to get a blessing before church was over. Believe me I did! As the service started every song was "my song" just for me...in particular a part of a song was: EVERY BLESSING you pour out I WILL TURN BACK to praise & another part: you give and take away, you give and take away and STILL MY HEART WILL CHOOSE to say blessed be your name...I still get shivers! It was at that moment I realized how truly blessed I was. God has kept me through so much in my life, when my husband died he was there to carry, comfort, and guide me through those long dark days until I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, my oldest son had been baptized and filled with the Holy Ghost, and following the service my youngest son was going to be baptized. How much more blessed could I have been at that moment in my life! Well when you are a single mom and all the burden is on your shoulders, your boss tells you she is going to cut your hours and you realize in an instant your summer plans just went down the drain it is REALLY HARD to see the blessings! Despite all that had been happening God had already made a way, and the boys ARE GOING TO YOUTH CAMP!! Folks you don't understand...this is worth shouting over!! Now the boys know God truly answers prayers even if it is a prayer to go to camp. This is building a strong foundation for them to know they can ask God for ANYTHING and HE will provide! If you only knew how good God is...your life would NEVER be the same!

In Rememberance...

Today is the day most Americans will remember those who have fought for our freedom. One of the most awesome things I have ever done was when I was in Washington D.C. I had the privilage of going to the Wall from the Vietnam War and the Statues from the Korean War. The statues told a silent story and the tour guide gave me goose bumps telling us how to read the story. I can't wait to go back and go to the Arlington Cemetary! I want to thank my dad for the time he served this country. I appreciate the freedom we enjoy and I am thankful for his time served. I have numerous family and friends who also served and I want to thank them as well. My Uncles: Cliff, Tommy, Larry, and Bill, my friends: Joanna, Lonnie, Allison, Jerry, Carl, Gidget, and all the military at Life Tab. My hats off to your dedication to serve and protect! My family truly appreciates all y'all do. Hope you enjoy the pictures blow and that you have a fun and safe day.

13 Years

Today, May 23, I would have been married 13 years. Remembering all we packed into 6 years I can only imagine what we would have done/accomplished in 13. In addition to not being able to post a pic of us, I am really sick and can't even do anything in memory of :(. Oh well...you can see a pics of us by clicking on my facebook or myspace link at the right.

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day mom! Love you lots and hope you have a great day. Hope all the mom's out there have a great day.